Saturday, July 30, 2005 @5:46 PM
ROAR.
hmm.
i perceive prelims to be some unfanthomable phantom.
like Santa Claus he will come and go mysteriously.
boO. i have no intention of encouraging you to pursue your already deeply embedded thoughts of reporting me to imh.
thanks to azlin unseen paragraph writing exercises, my evident sources of evidence are very erm.
effectively evidential.(it fits the context of the topic sentence i'm trying to explain well)
i quote yx:"omg. i seriously want to send you to that. erm what's that called?..
MPH..."
(:
ok maybe i'm not good yet.
but my essays starting to look quite ok. and i wrote this 12 paragraph thing that was 4.5 pages long. and my handwriting is like how minute lah. so SMILE. -
chikcheekoeand i'll shake it like a polaroid picture.
i think a maths is good penmanship practice. you see midway into the week my handwriting started going haywire-strawfire and no matter how much i tried drawing out alphabets, it didn't improve.
spoilt a pen somemore lah. then i heated the tip and forgot it was hot and wrote with it and went AAACK SO HOT. then it cooled down. then i inspected it and found that the ball was missing. maybe it popped out. cool right, homemade bazooka.
anyway undaunted by the excruciatingly painful massive volcanic tragic and fatal setback, i started doing maths with another pen. then woahh. so pretty already the words. sadly, i probably looked like dayang looking pleased at himself that night.
i want mass run. and the stupid staircase chase. (:
i'll miss our class.
Wednesday, July 27, 2005 @10:08 PM
hello.
i wanna be a nicer girl. ((:
kept spacing out during lesson today la.
but somehow the notes i took today were more organised than usual
so hmm. i should continue to daydream. ehh.
i'm getting used to feeling empty now. i guess i wouldn't thrive so well all they cared about wasn't for me to study.
it's pretty stupid, cos if i study three quarters of the day my rate of absorption will be very low.
so since i hope to be self sufficient as soon as possible, i try to sleep in the afternoons to strike an optimal balance in my life so i can effectively get good grades and get a good job soon after i graduate frm u!
yeahh. spastic.
i feel sad for some people who are self-absorbed.
but i don't think i'm capable enough to make a difference in their lives.
graduating from band really did do something to me. ):
i wish i could find my spur back sometime soon.. it's horrible to just stand around and watch cracks secretly forming in the foundations we've worked so hard to build.
i wish i could tell someone what i see.
Tuesday, July 19, 2005 @9:35 PM
its another beginning. another battle ground.
i wonder why i said that too.
there's an internal war inside of me. and i don't want it to stop
cos somehow it relieves the pain of swallowing so many secrets.
of hiding the bad things, and just sharing the good.
and having to endure a huge fault in me.
everytime a special psychic somebody notices i suffer internally, i further conceal the scars my pain create.
which only makes me sadder, thus willing me to appear happier. and so the scars deepen further, and my smile widens in proportion again.
you digust me. i loathe you. i cant stand being within a 500 nautical mile radius of your soul.
too bad. i'm in you.
i'm you.
purplet's gonna murder me if she finds out i'm posting in yet another blog.
i cant possibly say this in that blog can i.
some classmate wants to run away from home. and i'm happy for her, cos at least it's a feasible thing to do.
how i wish there was a way i could run away from myself.
